Lari Mengejar Ilahi

         Kerna ayam berkokokkah terbitnya mentari?

           Kerna terbit mentarikah hari kesiangan?

           Kerna kesiangankah kita berlari?

           Hari berlalu bersama mimpi semalam

           Dengan masa bak tetamu tak diundang

           Pergi tanpa bersua kata

           Hari ini masa kembali menyapa

           Untuk sekian lama kita berlari

           Mengejar itu dan ini

           Tanpa fikir dan hujah bistari

           Kenapakah kita berlari ?

          Apakah di hujung sana ada emas dan singgahsana?

          Bila kesiangan direbut  malam

          Dan tibanya masa untuk bersua pemilik tanah ini......

          Kita akan pergi jua  tanpa berlari

             Hari ini riang bertamu lagi

             Dengan syukur akan nikmat  dan anugerah

            Mengecap manis kehidupan untuk sekian lama

            Masih segar untuk bersolat dan berzikir

            Menghiasi malam dengan tangisan taubat

            Memohon sekelumit rahmat buat insan yang berdosa

          Bila ayam berkokok lagi di kaki langit

          Dan mentari muncul menegur alam

          Itulah rahmat dan tanda kasih

          Untuk kita terus berlari

           .......mengejar Ilahi

          Selamat Menyambut  Hari Ulangtahun

          Untuk aku dan sahabat-sahabatku yang mulia ...........

                                                                                                nordin abu bakar

                                                                                                shah alam

                                                                                                6 September 2012

Biarlah.....aku ingin menangis

Di bawah dentuman bunga api

Di celah kesesakan kenderaan malam

Dalam kebengitan pesta tahun baru

Aku terdampar menagih satu kepastian

Tentang keimanan dan kelalaian

Tentang nikmat dan kesyukuran

Tentang haq dan kebathilan

Tentang dosa dan kesombongan insan

Dentuman memecah hening iman

Mengajak insan terus berleka

Jauhnya hari perhitungan

Kerna esok baru bermula

Tahun baru, semangat baru, serba baru

Lupa akan dosa dosa semalam

Hilang bersama kepulan kepulan bunga api

Harus kah aku berbangga

Dengan harapan dan resolusi ruapan

Dari budaya yang meracun akidah

Ku ingin lari ke gua Hira’

Bersama Muhammad dan tangisan hatinya

Merenung dan meratapi umat yang lalai

Ku ingin menangis bersama Rasulku

Mengenang umatnya yang tersimpang jauh

Dari keampunan dan kesucian nurani

Biarlah aku menangis

Dalam qiam dan sujud

Memohon sekelumit ihsan dari yang Esa

Agar hidayah kan terus mencurah

Dan keredhaan yang diimpikan

Ku ingin terus menangis

Dalam  dakapan malam nan indah

Bersama zikir dan doa munajat

Menambat hati dalam rindu Ilahi

Menanti Fajar dan sinaran keimanan

Biarlah...aku ingin menangis

1 Januari 2012

Shah Alam 

Selangor

Sumpah Marina

Sang suria menyapa sepi
Merentas gelombang selat Melaka
Dalam termenung di kamar sunyi
Aku berbicara dengan sang bayu
Kenapalah aku di sini
Datang lagi membawa diri dan sanubari

Untuk dikenal dan mengenali
Merintih kasih membelai faham
Dalam berlari dan bermain-main
Mendaki bukit menurun lurah
Selagi kudrat ini terkandung badan
Dan kaki ini larat berlari
Kan ku tempuh semua ini
Biar ditawakan ulang kali
Mencemuh dan mencemeh
Macam orang tua nak mampos

Ku datang ada hajat
Ku pergi ada sebab
Ku kembali ada matlamat
Ku pulang dengan sumpah….
Akan ku bina bangsa ini
Agar mampu mendongak melihat alam
Mendabik dada menyata rasa
Mendokong cita-cita


Akan ku isi jiwa-jiwa yang kosong
Dengan semangat juang yang
Mampu mengharung lautan
Bisa meredah belantara
Bercita menggapai bintang-bintang
Ku tiupkan ruh iman dan islam
Agar terus memamah pahit kehidupan

Usah dikira wang dan ringgit
Usah dikira keringat yang menitis
Usah dihitung masa berlalu
Anak-anak sedang menuggu
Untuk belajar dan berbicara
Tentang hidup dan kehidupan

Akan ku jadi bak pepohon
Menghijau dan melata
Meneduh dan melindung
Insan-insan dari keperitan hidup
Moga dedaun kan terus merimbun
Sumpah berkelana
Untuk ribuan tahun lagi

Marina Cove
24 July 2011

Melakar Destinasi Cinta

Lahirku
Dalam dakapan cinta
Dari dua insan
Yang saling bercinta…mak dan ayah
Biarpun perit dengan hidup
Biarpun pahit mengunyah masa
Walau tanpa kata dan ucap
Cinta tetap ku rasa
Menusuk hati dan jiwa
Melakar tinggi bak mentari senja

Hidupku
Dicabar dengan cinta
Menagih dan merintih
Dari insan yang penuh luhur
punya hati yang bercahaya
Cuma untuk bekalan
Bila sunyi datang menyapa
Pada hujung malam
Buat teman bermimpi
Untuk hari esok…yang penuh dengan janji-janji
Tapi buatku….cinta hanyalah tipudaya
Merobek segala harapan


Hidupku
Masih dilindungiNya
Untuk terus bercinta
Dengan isteri dan anak2
Yang mengajar sabanhari
Akan erti cinta
Akan kata cinta
Akan ucap cinta
Indah sungguh anugerah Ilahi
Pada cinta dan yang dicintai
Megah tersangkut pada hati
Bak mata kail menagih mulut haruan
Makin disentap, makin merobek naluri

Hidupku
Sungguh bertuah, alhamdulillah
Dengan cinta ini
Ku belai dengan kasih
Ku usap dengan sayang
Inilah hartaku, dunia dan akhirat
Tiada lagi yang lain
Kan ku genggam bara cinta ini
Biar sekali ia membakar

Ku siram cinta ini
Dengan airmata
Pada malam-malam yang sunyi
Dalam sujud dan qiam
Agar dilindungi oleh Nya
Adakah cinta ku sama dgn cinta para rasul
Adakah cinta ku sama dengan cinta para sahabah
………para solehin wal muqorrobeen
Adakah cinta ku layak di persada jannah Mu
…sebagai cinta orang yang soleh

Ya Rabb
Suburkanlah cinta ini dengan iman dan taqwa
Lindungilah cinta ini dari kekufuran
Redhakanlah cinta ini untuk syurga mu
……almakwa wal Firdausi
Agar dapat kami bercinta …
Untuk selamanya
perkenankanlah
Ya rabbul masyriQain wa rabbul maGhribain

I am a teacher

When I was little
I saw my teacher everyday
Happy, angry, fed-up, bored down
Little I know the subject they taught
Just a routine stuff for me to do
Finish the homework
or meet a monster called pontianak
Day in, day out
I used to tell myself…...or others to me
To study hard for better future
Until I grew up wanted to be one
I practiced to write on the board
Like my teacher did
I practiced to hold the rotan right
So everyone will fear me
I practiced to speak out loud
So they can hear me
That day on
I knew my destiny
To be a teacher

Nowadays
They come into the class
With tight jeans and sleepy eyes
Make me wonder where were they last night
Talking to the moon and the stars
To fill the sleeplessness
Hiding behind the darkness
For actions beyond reasons
Howling the laughter
Through the night with no end
I sat to ponder
My role in this insanity
Can I look beyond the spikey hair?
Or pull up that bum-exposing pants…..
Maybe clean up that black-marker-dirty nails
Oooo I really want to snatch down
...that ugly-tangling earring from that boy
and that black-devilish lips ...whatever
so they can see and hear
with their hearts and souls
what I have prepared last night
yes I am a teacher now
teaching the unknowns to the unwanted
I lost for words
Or tricks to play
So they will be entertained
But we are no clowns
With blobby nose and big ears
I sat to contemplate
My role in this mad world
Where learning is a strange word
Pretending to sit and listen
Just to wait
For the hour to pass
For the day to turn dark
So they can talk…..
To the moon and the stars again
And smile to the darkness
That will hide their secrets
….from reality

To all teachers,
Remember our pledge
To mould and to nurture
The buds that will bloom
And color the horizon
Like rainbows ……
A flash of hopes and promises
To remind our roles
Despite the insanity, ungratefulness
So one day
They can stand tall
And paint the sky themselves

    Usah dikira wang dan ringgit

    Usah dikira keringat yang menitis

    Usah dihitung masa berlalu

    Anak-anak sedang menuggu

    Untuk belajar dan berbicara

    Tentang hidup dan kehidupan

    Jadilah kita bak pepohon

    Menghijau dan melata

    Meneduh dan melindung

    Insan-insan dari perit kehidupan

    Moga dedaun kan terus merimbun

    Untuk seribu tahun lagi

Yes, a teacher…....for eternity.
Happy Teacher’s Day folks!


drnordin
shah alam

Jawatan ini ...

(untuk mereka yang baru naik pangkat dengan jawatan baru di tahun baru....)

Jawatan ini …..
waLaupun tak sebesar mana
adalah amanah untuk dilaksanakan
ujian untuk iman dan taqwa
agar tak lagha..dengan kuasa dan reputasi

Jawatan ini ….
walaupun tak sebesar mana
sudah cukup buat insan
lupa diri dan agama
lupa kawan dan taulan
dunia adalah dia punya
macam ingin hidup ribuan tahun

Jawatan ini…
Walaupun tak sebesar mana
Menagih umur dan masa
Sampai rumah tangga jadi litang pukang
Anak2 merintih bersama buku Iqra
Yang tak mampu dibaca
Orang dirumah termenung
Mengenang dapur yg tak berasap
Menunggu nasi yang tak bejamah
Adakah lagi hari esok
Menanti ria berumah tangga
Menunggu dan membebel
Akhirnya …. Mencari sepi di kedai mamak

Jawatan ini..
Walaupun tak sebesar mana
Jangan jadi penghalang amal
mesyuarat tak berhujungan
sehingga bersolat di akhir waktu
appointment berpagi2an
hingga luput dhuhanya

Jawatan ini..
Walaupun tak sebesar mana
Cukup indah tak terkata
Tapi kita kan ditanya dan diasak
Pasal tugas dan tanggung jawab
Setiap detik dan masa
Adakah kerna tuhan atau manusia !

Shah Alam
6 Januari 2010

Cintailah Daku Untuk Seribu Tahun Lagi

(Unuk isteri tersayang Salwana Hassan)

Dengan penuh kedaifan kita mengikat janji
Janji sehidup semati
Mengharung badai menongkah arus
Ada masa kita jatuh tersungkur
Kalah pada ketentuan hidup
Tapi dalam berdua kita mampu ....
Bingkas intuk bina hidup cemerlang
Bina mahligai indah
Rupanya bahagia tak menginap
Di lantai marmar bertangga cengal
Rupanya nikmat hidup tak mewarnai
Ruang mewah berbingkai jati
Bila musibah melanda sebagai tanda
Peringatan dari Yang esa
Kita pasrah dengan hidup ini
Ia bukan kita punya
Taman2 indah bukan milik kita
Kita lepaskan ia.....
Dengan airmata dan sedu bertautan

Tapi diri ini bertuah
Kerna di sampingku masih ada
Kurnia Ilahi
Yang tetap bersama
Dalam hidup yang cukup mencabar ini
Kita melata mencari rasa
Terbang merentas awan
Mengisi hidup di tempat orang
Aku tak takut lagi
Atau gerun pada cabaran melanda
Maupun Gementar menempuh ujian
Kerna di sampingku masih ada
Kurnia Ilahi
Yang senyum menelan kepahitan
Yang girang menyelubung kesedihan
Yang bertahan demi kasih
Yang merana demi cinta
Yang menangis pada malamnya
Hanya untuk diri ini
Mengenal satu erti kejayaan

Aku bersyukur
Untuk cinta yang masih mekar
Kasih yang masih berbunga
Kekadang mawar menghias kata
Kekadang melur menyentuh rasa
Kemboja juga membaja masa
Dan cempaka menyingkap ketika
Kita masih ada malam malam indah
Ditabur bunga bunga cinta
Mendengar bisikan kasih
Mengungkap seloka indah
Dari hati yang penuh merasa
Bak dewa dewi dari kayangan
Bermain dan bercinta
Bersaksikan malam penuh shahdu
Dan bintang yang bertaburan di langit
Membelai dan mengurai
Kata kata cinta


Kan senja nan menjelma
Melambai usia
Mengajak masa
Bila Tuhan menuntut kita
Usah diratap dengan kata
Usah diratib dengan airmata
Ingat janji kita
Untuk terus hidup
Berkasih dan bercinta...seribu tahun lagi

Kita punya anak anak
Bagai saksi cinta agung
Bak bunga mewarnai pepohon
Bak pelangi melangkah awan
Sungguh indah cinta kita
Hidup riang dalam jiwa anak anak
Untuk terus mengilai dan mengata
pada dunia seadanya

Ku bersyukur pada Ilahi
dengan hidup yang penuh nikmat
pada kata kata yang riang
pada janji yang terpahat
pada hati yang terikat
pada kasih yang terukir
pada cinta .........
cintailah daku untuk seribu tahun lagi.

Ps : happy anniversary , my love.

Pesan Abah

Pesan Abah
(Buat anakanda Nabiela Husna dan seluruh anak2 yang akan mengambil PMR nanti)

Dikala ini
Munkin hati begitu resah
Mengingatkan ujian yang bakal dihadapi
Satu beban yang begitu berat untuk kudrat ini
Terasa begitu cepat masa datang dan pergi
Terasa terlalu banyak untuk diingati
Terasa terlalu sedikit untuk bekal ke medan ujian
Terasa terlalu dangkal untuk merumus
Terasa terlalu tinggi untuk dicapai
Terasa terlalu luas untuk direnangi
Terasa terlalu dalam untk ditimba
Tapi.....
Ingatlah Pesan Abah
Bahwa itu adalah mainan minda
Usah dilayan jauh dibayang
Hanya peringatan
Yang diri ini perlu bersedia
Untuk diasak pelbagai soal
Bagi menguji minda
Mengajak faham
Menggamit bijaksana

Ingatlah pesan Abah
Untuk terus tenang
Menyelam masa merentas ketika
Untuk sujud bersolat
Memohon ampun dari Yang Esa
Untuk tadah berdoa
Menjemput rahman dan raheem
Buat bekal ke medan perjuangan

Perjalananmu masih jauh
Jalan masih penuh berliku
Di perhentian ini
Pada ujian ini
Buatlah yang terbaik
Lontarkanlah yang terjauh
Uraikanlah dengan faham dan tahu
Lapik ungkapan dengan jujur
Lempar kata-kata dengan sopan
Kejayaan tak dikukur dengan nombor dan abjad
Tapi pada tahap usaha dan tawakkal
Rafakkan syukur pada Tuhan
Moga kemenangan milik kita
Ingat Pesan Abah
Renunglah pada langit
Dalam kepulan awan Abah kirim doa dan restu
Dengarlah deruan angin
Pada sang bayu Abah kirim bisikan kasih dan sayang
Senyumlah pada mentari
Dengan sang suria Abah pancarkan harapan dan cita-cita
Lambaikanlah pada hujan
Dalam titisan air Abah hembuskan nur kemenangan
Tadahkanlah tangan pada Tuhan
Dalam Iman dan Taqwa ada kejayaan hakiki

Ingatlah Pesan Abah
Untuk dunia dan akhirat


Shah Alam
5 Oktober 2009

Eidul Fitr

ALlahuakbar ! ALlahuakbar ! ALlahuakbar ! walliLlahilHamd!
Ramadhan has officially come to an end. Some people celebrate the end of it while some others celebrate the start of a new dawn in Syawal. Some celebrate because no more puasa and some celebrate the successful puasa. Some celebrate for a new baju melayu while some celebrate for a new fashion of tudung. Whatever the reasons are, whether they are right or wrong, a sacred month of Ramadhan has again left us. We hope to see it again next year.
Taqoballahuminna wa minkum taqobbal ya Kareem

This Ramadhan saw a more peaceful world over. Or maybe that’s what I expected. Maybe people were tired of fighting and put up a rest for a while. For my family and I, Ramadhan brought a wind of change into our household. Something for the better and I hope to remain within our focus for the rest of the time. The country sees a more stable political landscape and productive economy ahead of us. I just hope for the future to be more certain for our kids to grow and have a good life of their own. But in Kelantan things have not change much. Life is hard for some as it used to be for many of us. People are poor and helpless as always where the old ones are stuck at home scrimping with the leftovers that life has to offer. We can see this on the streets, the surau and the masjid where most of them are; spending time to post hope and prayers so pains can be at least tolerated. But life in Kelantan has always been difficult so nothing is new. The society stands strong with minimum modern development and infrastructure for so long that the culture embedded unique characters deep into the society.

Have a safe and meaningful Eidul Fitr !

Di Pagi Syawal
Dalam syahdu bertakbir
Fikiran melayang ke bumi Gazza
Adakah anak-anak kerdil punya kemeriahan ini
Adakah muda mudi ilai keceriaan ini
Adakah bapa-bapa masih menagih syahid
Adakah ibu-ibu masih mengharap kepulangan
Kita menitis airmata kesayuan sedangkan
Mereka menangis bumi diambil orang
Berjayakah kita hari ini kalau ada yang merempat
Muliakah Islam kalau umat tertindas dan ditindas
Dalam syahdu bertakbir
Fikiran terus melayang
Ke pondok-pondok usang
Apa lah juadah dipagi syawal ini
Untuk mengubat hati yang pilu
Munkin sedikit wang zakat
Dari insan yang perihatin
Atau sekelumit doa dari hati yang bersyukur
Munkin juga sekilas sepi
Dari anak-anak yang tak muncul berkunjung
Airmata peneman duka
Merenung senja di kaki langit
Adakah mentari pagi kan menjelma
Menyapa insan menyuluh restu

Dalam syahdu bertakbir
Aku berfikir jauh
Menyelam sanubari
Mencari dosa kelmarin
Untuk disuci dan digarap
Agar diri ini khusu’ bersujud
Meminta dan merayu
Keredhaan serta kerahmatan
…..dari Yang Esa

Aku terfikir lagi ….
Adakah insan ini layak bertemu Engkau
Dengan secubit amal dan sekepal doa
Untuk mengetuk pintu syurga
Menagih rahmah wal maghfiroh
Wa itqan min an nar
Tiada apa yang nak ku sembahkan
Hanya taqwa dan syukur
Bagi kehidupan yang penuh nikmat
Hari ini kan ku raikan
Anugerah Ilahi
…untuk aku, alam dan manusia


eidul fitr
1 syawal 1430H

aku menanti

Dalam termangu aku kesepian
Didakapi gelap malam yang penuh syahdu
Tangan ku tadah
Mendoa kerahmatan dan keampunan
Untuk diri yang berdosa
Yang Mendabik dan menyanggah
Keagungan Ilahi
Sungguh sial dunia ini
Menuba iman yang rapuh
Bagi santapan nafsu yang rakus
Solat diringan-ringankan
Puasa dilekeh-lekehkan
Qiam ditangguh-tangguhkan
Hukum Tuhan dipersenda-sendakan
Untuk apa hidup ini
Kalau hanya….
Sekelumit senyum yang pahit
Secebis cinta yang palsu
Seikat janji yang kosong
Sebaris pangkat yang dangkal
Sejunjung kuasa yang boneka
Kita ditipu buat seketika
Tapi tidur selamanya
Dengan mimpi dan harapan
Bagai bintang dan bulan
Indah menawan tapi luluh tergapai

Tapi kita punya Tuhan dan Rasul
Yang menyayangi kita lebih dari segalanya
Kita punya Kitab dan Sunnah
Yang bercahaya bak bintang-bintang di langit
Kita punya malam-malam yang indah
Untuk berdoa dan bertasbih
Menyuci diri yang berdosa
Kita punya malam al qadr
Yang menjanji seribu kemenangan
Ingin ku cari malam al qadr ini
Buat bekalan dihari esok
Bila bertema azza wajalla
Menagih syurga dan keredhaanNya…..

Aku menanti….
Moga malam ini ku temui al- qadr


Shah Alam
20 Ramadhan 1430H

Ramadhan will arrive again

The year seems short
It was as if yesterday I woke up for
…..that heavenly sujud during qiamullail
…..that tears afraid of an-Nar
…..that serenity of soul during the prayers

Ramadhan will be here again
…waballigni Ramadhan
And let me reach Ramadhan
For this mind and soul
Longing for Your rahmah wa maghfiroh

Let this coming Ramadhan
Will be brighter and livelier than the last
With nur iman and taqwa
From the cleansed soul and
The heart that longs for the redha’ of the Creator
The forgiveness that has been promised
And the Jannah…….

Ramadhan will come
With maghfiroh wa rahmah wa ridhuan min Allah
For the good soul to see and to grab
The opportunity that might be the last
Let there be the easiest way
To freeze all the evil actions and thoughts
From within or out
From up above or down below
Let this soul be strong enough
To travel through the nur of Ramadhan

Let this Ramadhan
Be the best among the best
For the many years of my living
The days will be no more long and thirsty
The nights will be no more short and sleepy
I want to spend time with ALlah and His words
Contemplating the good news and bad
Listening to the prayers from the Angels
Asking forgiveness of the sinful actions
Seeking refuge from the evil thoughts

Ramadhan is the light
that brighten up the dead soul
To taste the heavenly sweetness
As an ‘abid who long for his master
For maghfiroh wa rahmah wa ridhuan min ALlah

Ya Rabb
…..waballighni Ramadhan

A Tribute To My Dear Love !(Beloved Mother of My Children)

My Dear Love!

as the time dawn upon us
we waded thru gracefully
facing the pains and melancholy of life
we clinched on each other
grasping the joy that promised

is life full of lies and empty promises ?!
I don’t want to believe so ...
for my life with you ...
is like rainbows over the meadows
full with bright and beautiful colors
that will never go away ....
or brittle out into the oblivion

life is never too short
my love to you will go far beyond
You've been so dear and loving to me
You've sacrificed yourself for me
You haven’t got time for yourself just to let me work
You have worked hard just to help me
Thank you my love !

You’re sad because you feel I was unhappy
You’re worried because you feel I was terrified
You’re frightened because you feel I was afraid
You cheered me up when I was down
Today I just want to let you know
that I love you so very much
forever.....and ever

Happy Mother’s Day, my dear

A tribute to my mother !

Mothers do come from heavens. They brought down the heavenly warmth and scents under their feet----syurga di bawah telapak kaki ibu. The tastes of heaven have been a primary source to calm down our restless souls, fears, panic,loneliness and melancholic. Being with mother would cease the world as a threat but a safe place to be. Nothing would matter as long as mother is here. My mother is no different for she has been the source of our living. No matter how well off we are or highly educated with all sort of academic qualifications, talking to mother is always resourceful; she could explain things from her own perspectives that we sometime miss altogether. Some mothers like mine, are not well educated in terms of modern schooling and all but they have the innate ability to raise us all just as well. My mother lives a hard life as our family is unfortunately poor. Alhamdulillah we have accepted our misfortune and have lived through it for so many years but we even more so respect mother for going through it very painfully. My father was a coolie at the railway station ;so not much would come from that just enough to fill up the dinner mat ( we sat around a mat for meals). My mother at some point was a full time house wife and could not help out with the finances. During those times I remember that tears were always flowing down her cheek to soothe the sadness. As a child I have never really understood why we were so poor that made our life so difficult. We were happy though to have each other and enjoyed getting on each other’s nerves, so being poor did not really bother me that much. I guess every kid has that kind of gut that keep them survived. We have our mothers, so not to worry.

At one point mother went on to make dresses at the market. She really liked being out of the house for a change. In her absence, we just managed ourselves for lunches and schools. She likes sewing and making dresses but ,truthfully speaking, she is not really good at it. That’s because her orders would always come back for repairs. I was always with her when those people came to demand this and that. She would serve them tea when they came to the house just to listen the harsh words that they threw onto her for ruining the order. I listened from the corner of the house and blaming mother for keep accepting the orders although she knew she has no ability or skills to fulfill them. I was so proud as father was always behind her and supporting her all the time. If I were to have my way I would kick that bitch and the no good husband out of my house and to stop them from talking to my parent like that.

One thing about mother is that she knows how to make friends. She would go all the way to entertain her friends and from her many conversations she really enjoyed their company as well. She likes to dress up in bright colorful dress the kind of tone and colors for young gals. I guess she is always young at heart. When father was ill of diabetes.,mother was always with him night and day. It was hard for mother but even harder when father lost his mind due to illness. Remember “The madness of King Henry the Eighth” ? that was the sickness that dawned upon father. At one point we had to tie him up so he would not cause any injury to himself. So sad and I still could not talk about the last days of my father. But mother was always with him and cared for him. When father died at home during Ramadhan of 2000, mother was there to ease the pain of death.

After the death of father, the tasks of caring and nursing were still there for mother. She would wake up at night for our grand mother. And this would be going on for another few years until grand mother died. My mother is still ok today but not as healthy as she used to be. Her daunting life has taken toll on her health; she is tired and breathless. She is tired for caring and nursing people but never complain because she knows that is her life. Nowadays we are trying our very best to care for her; the twelve of us. Her hearing has started to go off, her vision also begins to fade away and she could not travel far any more. We pray for Allah to give her strength and good health. We would like her to remain with us , to love and cherish, for so many years to come. Happy Mother’s Day , Mak!

Mom

Mom brought me to life some time ago
To let me see the world
With my own heart and soul.
She knew only not to let me hungry
With little food under the saji
That dad bought yesterday

Mom never had life of her own
Scrimping all day long to let us live
Tears would be ritual
To ease the pain that came with us
Life was brutal for Mom
But she neither complained nor gave up
Because she knew tomorrow will bring sunshine
For another hope … another promise
She kept swinging the milk-stained buai
Sang lullaby to help us sleep
So she could go on with her never-ending chores

Mom gave me courage
Filled me up with perseverance
Let me walk my own steps
Gave me light for the darkness
Helped me stood up during a fall
She gave me a rope …
…tie it up , son! when you’re at the end of it
never to let it go


She is my Mak …
..and will always be the greatest mak in the whole wide world !

Forgive me, Mak ….. and the rest of us
If words are harsh , actions are stupid or manners are absent
We are still learning the first steps
Still need your hand
To hold on
So not to be swept away
By the world that has gone mad

Mom, do you still remember the salawat?
That you always sang
To calm us down from the fiery darkness
It has not left my ears
As if the words and the rhythms
Were in me…forever

Mak is still with me today
For me to thank and have a good hug
Just want to say that .. I love you mak!
Truly from the bottom of my heart

happy mother’s day, Mak!


drnordin
early may 2006
(revised) May 2009

When The Heavens Wept

Under the cold cloudy sky
time seems to stand still
the serenity of body and soul
finally at peace
the morning dews drop
sent down from the heavens

cry no more Tuan Guru
we are here, we are all here
behind you
to provide and protect
the motherland of ours
even if the heavens call upon you
we will still be here
to chant and cherish
the hope that you’ve given us
---when there is hopelessness
The courage
--when there is disappointment and despair
The reason to live and be alive
--when death is inevitable

Shed your tears Tuan Guru
The evils have gone
Washed away by the tsunami of iman and islam
What left is the monument of true belief
The greed and hypocrisy once again
Plunged into abyss
For a million years to come

Don’t cry Tuan Guru
This land is ours
Forever and ever
So the children can understand
The true words from heavens
Without fear and intimidations
To live heavenly ever after
In the land
Where the green and white flag
Fly high above the sky
To show the world …….
That Iman and Islam rule here.




Don’t cry my dear Tuan Guru
Up above
the heavens will weep with you
for people have betrayed their pledge
to live and die with Islam
but instead
they stole the truth from us
protect the ugly little bastard
that rape the children
keep the dirty ones in the house
let the evils
speak and intimidate Islam
we will have that no more
in this beloved land of Kelantan
the last frontier of our belief
to cradle the true believers and warriors
that will continue
our journey for a better future.


Don’t cry Tuan Guru
We are all here
For God and human kind.

drnordin
shah alam
march 8, 2008

My Dark Moments #1 : the school days

I was grateful to get into this school of mine until I realised that I was at the Gate of Hell ....

My school days ……. full of memorable moments
The dark ones especially, stone-carved for eternity
In the corner of my mind
It was the best school you could possibly go, they all said
The best in hell I supposed
It was like yesterday when I sat in the classroom
wondering….
What’s this place? Who are these people?
Some faces looked nice and so friendly
The others blank and lost
But later they all had one thing in common
Bold and brutal

Form One was fun and exciting
The teacher came in and asked where have all the chalks gone
I went away and came back with a bunch
They made me a monitor for that effort
Not that I know how to be one
Just want to impress the girls … the pretty li’l girls
I tried to get one … the girls I mean
But never succeeded…they went for the macho ones
I dreamt on …until I realized that’s what I’m good at … dreaming
They called me names (never mind…no need to spell that out)
For the stupid face with no hair and the sweet li’l ass that I got

The following year was terrible … I mean hell !
The big boys knew about my sweet li’l ass
And started to chase me around when the lights went out
I’d end up at the place where I always hide…. the toilet
Sometime I woke up and still there …. in the toilet
I was weak and small and never put up a fight
So lonely and confused I could not imagine
how I got through all those years
full of misery

Once this boy asked me to swap beds
I sleep in your bed and you can sleep in my bed
Night after night after night
I just didn’t understand why but never dare to ask
This swapping thing went on for a week or so
And then one night he said
I sleep in your bed but you can’t sleep in mine
Now, where in hell am I suppose to sleep ?!
Looking back , now I realize what it was all about
He didn’t want to make up his bed in the morning !!!

the nightmare continues ….